Summer might mean sunning in the great outdoors for most dudes and dolls, maybe it means tramping outside and playing with Mamma Nature and lapping up the weather she’s been gracious enough to supply.

June, July and August for a girl named Kristopher mean enjoying unnaturally cool, conditioned air inside inorganic structures man-making cityscapes, it means—

The only wild beasts I observe live in the zoo of my wardrobe: ostrich purses, ponyskin pumps, and snaky clutches. 

Though I’m considering camping out in this Bless coyote hammock. 

The hammock’ll fit in my shoebox’s living room.

I just need to find a matching chinchilla bikini to complete my summer fun.