Hotness is the new hottness – you heard it here first. There’s something about hot sauce in its many incendiary incarnations that inspires a certain fire in the belly among people everywhere. And so read on as we bring you a world of hurt.

Nine times out of ten, the first word that will pass a pair of burning lips is Tabasco. Pepperheads everywhere consider this the sine qua non of seasoning, and rallymatt is so dedicated to the stuff he goes whole hog and buys it up by the gallon, which our very own NOTCOT appreciates on a more ironic level: “The idea of having this sitting on a shelf - maybe next to a shot glass. All alone. Seems amusing enough to have to get a GALLON jug of the stuff.” Jonathanwhite likes the stuff just fine … with a little doctoring. “I make our house hot sauce by mixing equal part of Tabasco and chilpotle peppers. It sits on our table next to the salt and pepper, the kids call it ‘dad’s ketchup.’” Take that, Heinz.

But Americans don’t have the corner market on hot sauce. Our neighbors to the south know a thing or two about salsas picantes. Most picked on ThisNext is Cholula. Consistently, fans extol its balanced flavor and moderate heat. It’s esswedl’s favorite because “it’s pretty hot, but not like one of those braggadicio sauces named something like ‘Ass Blaster.’” Loft3 is in the same camp: “Cholula is just right. She’s no wimp but she’s also not going to beat your tastebuds up and steal their lunch money. Lots of flavor and just enough spicky kick to bring boring food to life.” And both Staviean and nrogers call it out as a perfect companion to eggs, as well as steak, tamales and pizza.

Speaking of hotting up your ‘za, Sarah J. Gim at Slashfood reaches for sriracha, the Southeast Asian hot sauce in the convenient squeeze bottle, to slather on her slices. ThisNexter aidamollenkamp also keeps a bottle of the stuff on hand at all times. Looking to another corner of the globe, erinskitchen digs on the harissa for her North African cooking, thanks to its “smoky, slightly sweet and spicy flavor.” Although harissa is technically an Algerian/Tunisian condiment, Jennifer Jeffrey doesn’t mind if you use it on her other half’s delectable Moroccan fare.

Of course, balance and subtlety are not everybody’s thing. You can always follow The Hot Zone’s recommendation for hyper-hot Xochitl habañero salsa. Or, if you want to simply blow your own head off with a lethal dose of capsaicin, you could drop by Hot Sauce Blog and invest in some Caveat Emptor, a collector’s edition, “mirror-finished etched flask … filled with 4 ounces of straight oleoresin of capsicum rated by its manufacturer at 4 million Scoville units.” That should be enough pepper punch to take down a field of bison. (It’s worth noting that Hot Sauce Blog is to my knowledge the only blog with its own eponymous condiment, Hot Blog Sauce.)

Myself, I like the hot stuff. I personally always have Tabasco, sriracha (and its garlicky cousin, Huy Fong Chili Garlic Sauce) and Tapatio (as opposed to Cholula, though I like them both equally) always in the fridge, just waiting for the opportunity to continue the relentless deadening of my taste buds. But for a special treat, a simple blend of chili powder and honey makes a magical concoction. It’s great just as a condiment, but as a glaze over ham or turkey … oh, my.