Wallets: the go-to gift for dads, sons, uncles, brothers, boyfriends and guys everywhere. It’s painful, I know. You’re like, “Geez, thanks Santa — I’ve dreamed of having a $13 faux leather wallet from Target since I was a boy.” It’s true though, when the ideas run dry for that special dude in your life, you always resort to the wallet.

Don’t get me wrong though, there’s nothing wrong with a wallet. In fact, it’s probably about time for a replacement. I’m just saying, get something original, get something fun — not something we can pick up at JC Pennys anytime we feel. So for the loving mothers, clueless girlfriends or hesitant sisters, this list should get you started…

Logo T-shirts have gone through many phases - the product placement tee, the humorously reworked logo tee (FedUp - get it?!?), the completely fabricated and slightly racist logo tee (cough - urban outfitters - cough) - and now, the based-on-a-true-work-of-fiction tee. Last Exit To Nowhere, a company based out of Nottingham, England, promotes invented companies made famous or infamous by the stories they inhabit - and company founder Mike Ford makes sure their logos are poetically suited to the company’s character and context as told in the story. Thus, a logo for “Bladerunner“‘s Tyrell Corporation incorporates a frowning owl - a reference to the scene in which Deckard visits Tyrell for the first time and sees an artificial owl - while Amity Island, from “Jaws”, gets a woman serenely sunbathing on a float in the ocean. It’s a novel idea, one that harkens back to the days where the product placement in fictional works was actually fictional. ($36 at lastexittonowhere.com)

Eugenia Kim’s ducky-belted straw hat is a metaphor for you and your toyfriend’s relationship, for any ideal partnership:

What’s fab for one involved party is equally beneficial to the other—you partner, sans sappy sacrificing for sloppy second bests.

Like with this hat: gift your guy, and he’s turned into a ten, GQing for you like his baseball cap had struck out, while still getting to skimp on fixing his hair.  

Prefer my pimping less promises and more real world results before investing $255? I’ll play you straight: since I’m dating myself, I bought the cap pour moi. And now I’m beautifully boss, without having to fluff my hair in the a.m.

For being so great a girlfriend, I let myself get to second base before noon.

Though it’ll be a full fiscal year before your girl Kristopher will have time to review applications, I’m already outlining Boyfriend, Kristopher Dukes, LLC’s job description. To fill said position, applicant must be flawlessly groomed and gorgeous, though anyone will hesitate to describe him as such as he’ll be at least a foot taller than me with a gym body hard like his mind. This Greek physique will impress me with his time management skills, as I’ll wonder when weights weigh in, considering his highly competitive intelligence has him hustling hard most his waking hours. Smart, professional, metro-vain but masculine, he’ll vibe like this BBlessing leather portfolio.

Though he probably wouldn’t rock it.

Murses are kind of gay.

Though $3-a-gallon gas has some benefits —

At least a few hundreds in tax write offs for the power lunches and beauty bashes and soy latte dates your K cruised to.

— I’ve been toying with the idea of going more green.

And not just because that’s the color I almost turned after my Mr. Numbers accounted what I owe Uncle Sammy for 2006.

And not just because I finally went to pop organic food heaven Whole Foods and realized the girls are better looking there than at Ralphs.

It’s more because I’ve realized green can be chic, a happy marriage between form and function, style and substance, like these stock listings cufflinks tooled from recycled newspaper.

A little investment that maybe I can slip into my IRA contributions for 2006?

If you’re not gorgeously gifting your guy lingerie to unwrap off your gift of a hot little body, you ought to gift your boy - and yourself - some boxers. ‘Cause -

“How can you not love a company who’s motto is ‘love like a kid’?” asks Boy_Under. referring to Ginch Gonch sleepwear and underwear .

I suppose I can’t not.  And your 14th shouldn’t be heavy with drama, it ought to be fabulously -

“Fun fun fun underwear for your next play date. Everything from Western to kiddie inspired. Fire trucks, stars, and bandanas, oh my!”

Oh em gee, indeed, doll.

...continued: V Day: Boxing Up Your Boy

So, ladies, we already know that little lacy lingerie is the most gorgeous way to gift your boy come V Day.

And the next best thing to buying your beau something that’ll have you beautiful?

Buying your boy something that’ll have him beautiful, like Urth Perfect Travel Kit, which your boy will thank you for.

And if he doesn’t, time to go hottie hunting, for a fella who knows -

“This product is great, bit expensive but worth the $$s,” says Water Polo1. “I bought this from MenEssentials.com after reading about it on their forum. This seems to be a very hot product.. and becoming well known. The products all smell great… And it works amazingly.”

Tell me more, doll.

...continued: Gifting Your Beau Beautiful on V Day

I mean “accessories.”  “Accessories for the men.”

Though I am talking shiny, pretty things, like this Bulgari B. Zero 1 ring, or  Mondera sterling silver sapphire men’s ring, which may win you a few glances from the ladies. “I’m all about wearing men’s jewelry,” says Chantel. “Sometimes it has the classic, architectural look I crave. Women’s jewelry can be a little over-done for me.”

Amen to that, doll.  Despite my fetish for 6” fetish shoes, I prefer no drama, no non-sense sort of looks.

“This Mondera sterling silver sapphire men’s ring is beautiful and my birthday is coming up. Any takers?”

Maybe so - you’re so mignon, and -

“I actually might buy it for myself.”

Fine. I like you even more, then; I love boss ladies who take care of themselves.  

I might follow your lead and make a very merry Christmas for myself a la this Nixon men’s watch, The Ticket, though maybe I should be good and gift one of my brothers.

...continued: Gift Guide: Baubles for Boys

I mean “handsome.” “Handsome for the men.”

Truly.

‘Cause I said it before, I’ll say it again: I’m not really interested in meeting a KRiSTOPHER prettier or more mignon than me. If anything I’m more about -

”- your favorite road warrior: Urth’s Perfect Travel Kit bundles face wash, shave formula, face balm, and face scrub in convenient (and TSA approved) 2 oz bottles,” says Omiru.

Convenient, chic, your boy will thank you.

And if he doesn’t, go get your hottie hunt on, find a dude who will dig organic soaps handmade in “sophisticated colors like two tone brown and orange or sparkly navy blue,” describes Laura Sweet.

I promise I meant the “dude” part of that last sentence. Ms. Laura Sweet, you left out the part about them being shaped as -

” - the famous mudflap girls,” says Laura Sweet.

Exactly. Because your boy’s a sensitive (“Nice, organic”) dude (“Hot - hot girl”).

...continued: Gift Guide: Beauty for the Boys